NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
It was yet more nonsense dorm the Biden White House on Thursday, this day with its decision to blame “MAGA” Republicans for “extreme heat” in a statement about the summer weather now that early summer is over and the late July and August heat waves have begun.
Beginning the statement, the Biden White House said, “We understand that MAGA Republicans, the extreme enemies of science that doubt climate change is happening, are the ones responsible for all this hot weather we now see. Temperatures, in fact, are 3 degrees higher on average this July than the average July in 1850.”
Ignored there is that most temperature measuring stations used to be in the country side, which is cooler because of trees, but are now in the cities, which are hotter because of all the concrete, asphalt, and lack of trees. So, with the city temps hotter, the average temperature looks hotter.
Regardless, the White House continued with its statement, saying that because of “MAGA Republicans” and their “fascist views on weather,” extreme measures would have to be taken to “fight back against fascist heat waves.” Giving some examples of those policies, they then said:
President Biden has asked the Department of Labor (DOL) to issue the first-ever Hazard Alert for heat, and DOL will also ramp up enforcement to protect workers from extreme heat. For years, heat has been the number one cause of weather-related deaths in America. And workers, including farmworkers, farmers, firefighters, and construction workers, are disproportionately impacted by extreme heat. Since 2011, more than 400 workers have died due to environmental heat exposure, and thousands more are hospitalized every year. The Hazard Alert will reaffirm that workers have heat-related protections under federal law. As part of the alert, the Department of Labor will provide information on what employers can and should be doing now to protect their workers, help ensure employees are aware of their rights, including protections against retaliation, and highlight the steps the Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) is currently taking to protect workers.
Additionally, the Department of Labor will ramp up enforcement of heat-safety violations, increasing inspections in high-risk industries like construction and agriculture, while OSHA continues to develop a national standard for workplace heat-safety rules.
The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) is investing up to $7 million from President Biden’s Inflation Reduction Act to improve our nation’s weather forecasts. In partnership with universities and other institutions, NOAA will establish a new Data Assimilation Consortium focused on developing better weather-prediction capabilities and maximizing the value provided by NOAA’s global observing system. These improved forecasts will allow communities to better prepare for extreme weather events, including long periods of extreme heat. As the climate crisis contributes to worsening extreme weather events affecting Americans nationwide, this investment will give Americans the information and tools they need to stay safe.