NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. What’s going on in the White House? Well, Dr. Jill bundled up Biden in too many layers of sweaters and jackets yesterday, much like the younger brother in “A Christmas Story,” and Biden got hot. But instead of just taking off his topcoat, the senile president assumed that he was sweating because of “climate change.” So now the Biden Administration is going all in on “fighting the hot weather.” Such is what Biden said in a bizarre speech in which he complained about the weather…
Author: will
NOTE: The Following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Sure as rain, when something tragic happens, President Slow Joe Biden claims that his son Beau, who died of brain cancer unrelated to his military service in the Navy, died of that tragedy. Such was the case yet again recently, with Biden issuing a statement on what the administration is doing to combat AIDS and claiming in it that Beau died of AIDS. On this 35th commemoration of World AIDS Day, we remember those we have lost to HIV/AIDS and commit to accelerating our efforts…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Team Biden recently announced that a National Security Advisor to Team Biden had visited Guatemala to ramble about whatever it is that Team Biden is up to, and in the announcement made the visit sound like a success. Later reports indicated that it was quite awkward and went poorly after Hunter Biden’s cocaine habit was brought up, however. The press release said: National Security Advisor to the Vice President Dr. Philip Gordon and a delegation of high-level U.S. officials, including USAID Deputy Administrator Isobel Coleman,…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Kamala Harris again went on a nearly nonsensical ramble, this time about the state of “democracy” in the world and why she thinks it needs to be defended…a speech that was predictably full of her usual rambling and nonsense. She began by saying: So, there’s a lot to talk about, but let’s start with this. And I think it’s part of the theme of the evening. We love our country. We love our country. And there is so much about this moment and, certainly, the…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Another day, another disaster for the Biden Administration when it let Biden talk. This time that came thanks to Biden making an admission about the state of the economy during a speech on infrastructure and how it is helping build up the American economy. Rather than that going well, however, Biden instead rambled a bit about conversation he clearly didn’t have in the past, but claimed to have had, then went on to explain what is really going on that makes ok-seeming data far worse…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Hamas and Israel recently struck a deal to release some hostages and Team Biden immediately claimed it as a success of their foreign policy, despite no real evidence that they did anything other than a showy and expensive trip to the region that was mainly notable for how old and out of it Biden looked. In any case, both Joe and Kamala spoke about the matter, with Joe keeping it short and sweet at the behest of his handlers while Kamala did her usual thing…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. President Biden went full steam ahead with wokeness on Thanksgiving, using the holiday opportunity for goodwill not to lower the culture war temperature, but instead to ratchet it up to 11 and declare that Thanksgiving is actually “racist.” Beginning, he said: As families, loved ones, and friends across the country come together to celebrate Thanksgiving, let us be grateful for all the blessings of this Nation and its limitless possibilities. Throughout our country’s history, this season of reflection and giving thanks comes in good times…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. It’s another day with Biden as President of the United States, so America got another Biden gaffe shockers when his handlers made the mistake of letting him speak. Such came this time when Biden gave a speech on the JFK assassination and accidentally admitted that what really happened was the CIA assassinated JFK after he threatened to strip it of funding. Beginning his speech, Biden said: Sixty years ago today, President John F. Kennedy was assassinated, a defining moment of deep trauma and loss that…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Team Biden just announced a new “small business investment” program that it claimed would reignite the economic fortunes of America’s middle class. Unfortunately for those counting on it to create a brighter future, however, the program looks like just another Biden Crime Family money grab. Announcing the program, Team Biden said, “In advance of Small Business Saturday on November 25th, the Biden-Harris Administration is announcing new actions to support small businesses—a key pillar of Bidenomics—and releasing new data that highlights the small business boom taking…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Why is America acting the way it’s acting on the geopolitical scene? Why are we engaging in warmongering and other forms of conflict around the globe, for now clear reason nor with any obvious end in mind? Well, if President Joe Biden is to be believed, it’s because he was paid to act in a certain way. Such is what Biden said during a speech on why America’s role in the world is important, explaining that America has the responsibility of acting in a “leadership…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Speaking to a collection of world leaders and their advisors about why he and his administration are supporting massive investments in Red China, President Joe Biden explained that that country has been nice to his son Hunter, giving him lots of cash when he needs it. Beginning, Biden made the investments sound like part of a big campaign to invest in the world generally and fight the phantom menace of “climate change,” saying that lots of countries agreed on it and were making “substantial progress”…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Vice President Kamala Harris recently announced that the Biden Administration would be spending nearly a billion dollars on “women’s economic participation” in “sustainable” economic projects, by which she meant that favorites of the woke regime would be cut huge checks by the government in exchange for staying woke. She said: As part of U.S. government efforts to advance the 2023 Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) theme of “Creating a Resilient and Sustainable Future for All,” Vice President Harris is announcing the launch of the Women in…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. The Biden Administration’s war on free speech continues, this time with Vice President Kamala Harris leading the charge to gut the 1st Amendment in the name of fighting the phantom menace of “hate speech,” an imbecilic concept made up by those who are the butt of jokes or looking to quash the speech of their enemies. In any case, Kamala announced that criticism of her, as a black woman, would no longer be tolerated under the Administration’s “digital discrimination” policy. Her statement began tamely enough,…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. It’s apparently “World Recycling Day,” whatever that means. Team Biden and the fools composing it decided, for whatever reason, that the best way to celebrate the idiotic and entirely made up holiday would be with a statement given by President Biden about recycling. That went entirely as could be expected, with Biden first mumbling near incoherently about social justice and recycling initiatives, which is absurd, and then went on to start rambling about how his son Beau, who died of brain cancer, died of “recycling…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Things got exceptionally awkward at the White House on Monday evening, as President Joe Biden was jointly giving a speech alongside his significantly less senile wife, “Dr.” Jill Biden. It would have been bad enough on its own, but things got way worse when one attendee keeled over from a heart attack and Biden started yelling that his wife is a doctor (she has an advanced education degree, she is not a medical doctor). The incident occurred when Biden began speaking about the state of…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. The Biden Administration remains in charge and so disaster continues to result whenever they trot out President Joe Biden to…appear and try to look like anything other than a mummy (he normally fails), particularly when Biden is allowed to speak instead of just standing, grinning, and shaking hands. Such was the case, though worse than usual, on Monday. Then, President Biden met with the President of Indonesia and, instead of just mumbling and rambling about how wonderful Indonesian yams and history are, decided to ramble…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. What’s going on in the Biden Administration? Nothing good. Lately, it’s been a mix of spastic bombing campaigns and calls for ceasefire, as if America can conceivably be successful in bombing Iran with one hand while demanding everyone just calm down with the other. But while the potentially thermonuclear disaster in the Middle East…and Eastern Europe…and Taiwan Straight continues to unfold, Team Biden is declaring victory at home in America’s infrastructure buildup. Biden explained as much to a dubious crowd during a speech on infrastructure,…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. How’s Team Biden doing? Well, it angered the left wing of its party by siding with Israel over Palestine and Hamas, so now it’s trying to win them back before 2024 to stave off disaster, with it looking like step one of its doing so is banning free speech under the guise of combatting “hate speech.” That came on World Freedom Day, and what’s more, it was announced during Biden’s World Freedom Day proclamation, which he began by saying: Around the globe, we are seeing…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. Vice President Kamala Harris just had a call with President Herzog of Israel about the situation in the country and in Gaza. While the White House claims it went well, the reality is anything but. According to furious insiders, the call went so poorly thanks to Kamala’s lack of preparation, meaningless monologues, and cackling that President Herzog hung up. The White House’s summary of the call made it sound like a success, saying, “Vice President Kamala Harris today spoke with President Isaac Herzog of Israel…
NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such. One of Biden’s recurrent gaffes and lies is that, whenever he feels the need to try and garner sympathy from a crowd, he lies about the cause of death for his son Beau, who died in his forties just a few years ago. Though a tragedy, Beau’s death of brain cancer has mostly just been a political prop Biden uses. When a police officer shoots a thug, Beau died of police brutality while trying to stop racism. When terrorists act up abroad, Beau died in…