NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
Americans in DC that flocked to the fence surrounding the White House on Thanksgiving morning in the hope of seeing President Slow Joe Brandon do something dumb were in for an extra special treat and had something extra to be thankful for when, out of the blue, Brandon wandered outside in his bathrobe with an Easter basket and started hiding both loose candies and Easter eggs under the bushes and trees on the lawn.
Confused, people thought it was a prank and started nervously laughing, but Biden snapped at them when he heard the snickers and chuckles, saying “now what the heck, Jack?! Y’all better start showing some Easter spirit!” He then went back to hiding the eggs until Dr. Jill stormed outside, grabbed him by the ear, and dragged him back inside. CNN and MSNBC refused to cover the event, but Fox News Channel happened to have a team nearby that was able to catch footage of the hilarious event and capture a few moments that made for excellent memes.
According to our source within the White House, what happened was Biden was left on his own for a few hours as Jill and the staff finished setting everything up for the day. Hunter was supposed to stay with him and keep an eye on the senile president, but he quickly passed out drunk and Joe wandered off.
Rooting around in one of the boxes the decorations were being taken out of, Biden found and Easter basket and some eggs and, swiping candy from the pantry while the kitchen staff was berated by Dr. Jill for using mini Marshmallows rather than jumbo ones on the sweet potato casserole, started hiding the eggs.
No one even noticed, our source tells us, that he was missing until Jill stormed over to the room he was supposed to be in to get him to take some pictures and found Hunter passed out and Biden missing. Near simultaneously, one staffer opened Twitter and saw the memes making fun of the president for hiding Easter eggs, so Jill rushed outside to get him.
The White House then had to pretend it was all a joke but, because of Biden’s angry yelling at the crowd and Jill’s obvious displeasure when dragging him back inside, had trouble doing so.
KJP, instead of even trying to lie about what happened, just ignored the whole situation and refused to answer any questions about it during the press conference.
Biden later tweeted, however, that there was “lots of candy” for kids to grab if they wanted any.