NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
Biden keeps taking tumbles when he tries to go up or down the stairs of Air Force One. When going up and in full view of the camera, that’s obviously just because he’s a senile moron who can barely walk anymore. But there have been a few incidents where Biden starts at the stop of the stairs and takes a tumble down them, such as the recent incident in Poland. There, a blurry Biden could be seen trying to walk down the stairs but falling, with the grainy, low-resolution video not really showing what happened in much detail
Joe Biden falls down Air Force One stairs, falls up Air Force One Stairs, gets lost on red carpets.
Weeble Wobbles wobble but don't fall down like Joe Biden. pic.twitter.com/pwlxtEZOMg
— Mike Lamb (@ML73050761) February 23, 2023
Well, we just found out what really was going on there. It wasn’t that Biden just happened to fall down the stairs because he’s barely able to walk, but rather because Kamala pushed him.
News on that came from a Secret Service insider who wishes to remain anonymous for obvious reasons. According to that individual, what happened was:
“Biden was walking out of the plane and onto the stairwell. From there he was supposed to walk down the stairs and into the waiting armored vehicle. Our nerves were already on edge from the Ukraine trip, so we were all watching vigilantly, ready to get the plane back in the air if need be.
“But then the Vice President walked right up behind him and, pretending to swivel around to chat with someone near her, we think it was a member of her staff who was in on the plan based on the positioning for the maneuver being just perfect, hit him in the back with her hips.
“She’s a big woman, built like a tree trunk I might add, so that sent him tumbling straight down the stairs. She, of course, pretended to be horrified and rushed to his aid, but we weren’t buying it for a moment.
“That caused us to keep the two separate, sending her back to the states on a plane and keeping her confined in the Vice President’s residence, the Naval Observatory. Joe seems none the wiser, but we’re keeping an eye on Kamala. She obviously has her eye on the throne and is willing to do anything, and I do mean anything, to seize it.
“Joe, unfortunately doesn’t believe us or the First Lady, so we’re stuck having to deal with Kamala rather than just sending her away or arresting her, which is less than ideal from a security perspective.”