NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
Biden’s Labor Day speech to Pennsylvania steel workers was just as much of a boondoggle as anyone might have expected, with the president going off course during his speech and talking about Hunter’s influence peddling op when he was trying to make his life relatable to the blue collar workers.
That came when Biden started rambling about computers and how they’ve changed industry…a full few decades after they changed industry. He said:
When I look out at this crowd, I see folks in my neighborhood when I grew up in Scranton and Claymont. People with physical courage and brains. People who busted their necks their whole lives to care for their families. People who get up every day and work like the devil to pay their taxes and volunteer in their communities.
You’re too modest. You don’t talk enough about what you have to do. But I tell you — leaders all the time, “American union workers are the best.” And this is what I tell — I know every major head of state in the — in the world. Not a joke. It’s because I’ve been around. And they look to America for foreign policy issues. And guess what? I make the point: America has the best workers in the world. That’s a fact.
And you guys ought to talk about it more. It can take four to five years to train as an apprentice. It’s like going back to college. The jobs are constantly changing. The technology evolves. You have to keep stepping up. You have to get more training. You can’t — you — and so, you can’t be the worst in the world. You’re the best in the world. No, I — I really mean it.
You know, like the sheet metal workers who used to use hand-drawn blueprints to design ductwork in buildings now use sophisticated computer-aided design systems so the entire project can be laid out in 3D. It ain’t your father’s sheet metal workers. This is a different world, man.
Continuing, he added, “And I get it man, I get it. Back in the day, in DC, Washington, I mean, well…you get it, where I work. There, back then, you had to call people, find em in person, or write a letter. There was none of this email, texting, strolling all about without having to ever see another person! That’s all new! But lemme tell ya, getting on it is important. That’s how Hunter and I made our money in ummm, in DC. The big city. Hunter used text, he used email, he even used that cool thing where the face appears on the screen. That is how Hunter made so much money! He worked the technology really well. So, together, we need to learn to make American industry technological.”
The crowd was furious with the comparison and so started hissing and booing as Biden looked on in confusion.