NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
The White House just released a glowing statement on what “Dr.” Jill Biden is doing to help military families, saying that she is going to help develop a children’s art display corner in the White House. It said: “First Lady Jill Biden announced today The Military Children’s Corner, a new art display at the White House dedicated to our nation’s military children. As part of her Joining Forces initiative to support military and veteran families, caregivers, and survivors, Dr. Biden is leveraging art as an educational tool to help Americans learn about the experiences of the four million military-connected children whose parents are active-duty service members, National Guard or reservists, or veterans.”
Continuing, it quoted Dr. Jill as saying, “At home and abroad, I’ve met so many incredible military children. They may not wear a uniform, but they serve our country, too. During my travels, military children have frequently shared their artwork with me, offering a window into their lives. Inspired by their stories of kindness, ingenuity, and strength, I wanted to bring their art and talents to the White House. As visitors enjoy The Military Children’s Corner, I hope they also take a moment to reflect on the service and sacrifice of our military families.”
Trying to boost Jill yet further, it added, “As a military mom and educator for more than 30 years, Dr. Biden has previously debuted temporary art installations at the White House to help Americans learn more about the unique experiences of our military-connected families. In April 2022, to celebrate the Month of the Military Child, Dr. Biden partnered with Military Child Education Coalition to create a display in the East Wing featuring artwork created by military-connected children across the country and those stationed around the world. In April 2023, Dr. Biden debuted an installation inspired by a poem called “My Military Suitcase,” which featured miniature wooden suitcases designed by military and veteran children to reflect their journeys as military-connected families. Building on Dr. Biden’s previous art installations, The Military Children’s Corner provides a dedicated display at the White House to celebrate our nation’s military children all year round.”
Then it finally got to describing what Dr. Jill would actually be doing to help: “To help the military express its love and joy of diversity, Dr. Jill will be working with children of Air Force personnel to paint, for the Military Children’s Corner, a portrait of George Floyd.”
“Though not ever a service member himself, St. Floyd represents what the military fights for,” Dr. Jill said. “That’s why we are extremely excited for this opportunity, as it gives us the chance to speak about the important topic with the kids, which is what he stood for and how we can emulate him in all the good ways.”
Parents of the kids were less horrified than one might expect, as most conservatives left the military over the COVID-19 vaccines.