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McCarthy Announces That He’s “Excited to Compromise” with Democrats

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    Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

    NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.

    Hot off the heels of his recent victory, new Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy immediately got to disappointing the base, announcing that he was looking forward to “compromising” with the Democrats on all the issues on which there is the “opportunity for bipartisan reform”.

    That came as a surprise to many in the conservative base. They saw McCarthy present himself as a fighter in the wake of the chaos over his attempt to become the Speaker of the House and assumed (lol) that he was actually ready to do so. They took into account his strongly worded post-victory statements, taking note when he said things like “I hope one thing is clear after this week: I will never give up. I will never give up for you, the American people. And I will never give up on keeping our commitment to America.” Also exciting Republicans in the base were comments in his speech like “Our system is built on checks and balances. It’s time for us to be the check and provide some balance to the President’s policies…There is nothing more important than making it possible for American families to live and enjoy the lives they deserve” and “Our nation is worth fighting for. Our rights are worth fighting for. Our dreams are worth fighting for. Our future is worth fighting for“.

    But those platitudes aren’t what they should have been listening to. Rather, they should have taken note when he said “As Speaker of the House, my ultimate responsibility is not to my party, my conference, or even our Congress. My responsibility — our responsibility — is to our country.

    That, you see, was all he needed to weasel his way out of actually fighting the radical left and instead start to do the “compromise” thing, which really just means backing down to people who hate his voters and doing what the Uniparty wants rather than what his voters want.

    Such is what became immediately obvious in his most recent speech, during which he promised that, under his watch, Congress would ship tens of billions dollars more in weapons and foreign aid to Ukraine, that he would defend the increased funding for the IRS that many fear will be used to further target the middle class, and that he will be sure to send more money to Pakistan’s gender studies program than any Speaker of the House before him. He also promised “bipartisan action” on climate change, abortion, and transgender surgeries, meaning that he’s ready to back down on all of those issues too.

    Left out of the speech was any promise to take on the FBI, CIA, or the rest of the Deep State, nor did he give any indication that he plans on trying to effect even Establishment GOP priorities, such as cutting taxes or spending more on defense. But such is what most on the America First right predicted from the beginning, so it comes as no real surprise.

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