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Nancy Pelosi Feuds with Biden as Stock Market Crashes

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    Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

    NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.

    The American stock market has crashed hard thanks to Joe Biden’s utterly idiotic economic policies. From the heights it hit under Trump, it’s been going down lower and lower as Bidenflation rips through the economy and Biden leads America into the gaping maw of utter disaster abroad. Let’s go Brandon!

    Naturally, normal Americans have been quite upset by that state of things. Their pension plans, if they’re lucky enough to have them, are on the rocky shoals of pending collapse as their underlying assets crumble. Their bank deposits look to be in trouble thanks to the chaos caused by rising interest rates. Their 401k plans, IRA accounts, and other investment accounts are down. Their homes are worth less and buying a new one is harder than ever thanks to high interest rates.

    But it’s not just the average Americans who are in trouble thanks to the crashing stock market. Nancy Pelosi, the House of Representatives’ top day trader and stock picker, is too. She has massive loans dependent that she planned on paying for with her stock picks, and she’s now at risk of default thanks to plummeting stock prices making her trading strategy more difficult.

    That has apparently led to heightened tensions between Pelosi and the Biden Administration, as it wants Democrats to present a united front when it comes to the sort of policies it is currently undertaking to fight inflation. Pelosi, however, is straining against those orders from on high because of how her wealth could be lost as a result of it. In fact, she has reportedly had no less than seven meetings with Team Biden in which she has demanded that it reverse its policies or face her wrath and determination to go public and take the fight to the public square.

    Biden, however, has quite disliked Nancy Pelosi because she refused to let him sniff her seven years ago, so he enjoys see her struggle financially and isn’t particularly worried about her threats or financial well being.

    Pelosi, as a result of Biden’s intransigence, has taken to pressuring Hunter to get his dad to reverse policies. Though she can’t afford to hire Hunter, who’s currently under contract with the communist Chinese, she does have leverage with his paymasters and has used it to twist his arm and demand he get Biden to lower interest rates and make markets go up.

    As of now, the battle has bogged down and not led to any particular result, though Biden is growing tired of defending his policies and could back down rather than continue bickering with everyone.

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