NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
Things must have been awkward in the White House on Monday thanks to President Slow Joe Biden and his lack of comprehension regarding topical political subjects: in the runup to midterms, Joe, hoping to score some easy points on social media, posted a link to a story about Hunter’s laptop from hell and promised to “hold all those involved in this corruption accountable.”
In the series of tweets, which were quickly deleted after someone with a functioning brain in the White House realized what Biden was posting, Biden said:
“Look here, folks, this sort of behavior is unacceptable. You just can’t have people jetting off to China and collecting a bunch of cash while peddling influence. Can’t have it.
“I mean, what if this kid’s family ends up in power? It’d be unacceptable and cause some big league problems, let me tell ya! Heck, you couldn’t trust any of ’em to do what was in America’s interests rather than what those paymasters wanted.
“It’s just ridiculous this has been allowed to go on for so long and we gotta do something to fix it, Jack. So I’m gonna do that: I pledge we’re gonna start fighting, fighting hard to root out this corruption and stop it from happening!”
Those tweets were then deleted and the White House Twitter account posted that Biden had “copied the wrong link” and had meant to “post about the Trump children’s involvement in China, which is just at unacceptable levels.” They then reposted a link to a picture of a Trump-branded tie for sale in a Beijing mall and said that the tie was proof of “Donald Trump’s shameful corruption.”
That was then deleted after it was discovered that Hunter could be seen accepting a briefcase from a woman in a Chinese military intelligence uniform in the background while two women who looked like high-cost prostitutes hung around him.
Trump, for his part, scrounged up screenshots of Biden’s posts about Hunter and said, on Truth Social, “Finally something Biden and I can agree on! Hunter was doing some nasty things in China, things that Hunter and Eric would NEVER DO! Hunter definitely must be held accountable for his crimes, same with Slow Joe too!”
CNN then accused Trump of promoting “hateful rhetoric and conspiracy theories,” ignoring that Biden is the one who shared the link and made the claims about Hunter’s behavior being unacceptable after reading about what he appears to have been up to over the past decade or so.
The inside scoop on Biden posting the link is that someone let him log on to Twitter without supervision.