NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
President Biden just released his new tax hike plan and, as expected, it’s a doozy. It’d bilk the already overtaxed American taxpayer out of trillions more every year, further stifling productivity and punishing the productive by making them pay for the lifestyles of the lazy and incompetent.
Predictably, he claimed to be decreasing taxes and blamed “MAGA Republicans” for wanting to raise taxes, saying:
The President’s economic vision is to invest in America and grow the economy from the bottom up and middle out, not the top down. As part of his plan to cut costs for Americans and give families more breathing room, the President’s Budget cuts taxes for working people and families with children by almost $800 billion over the next 10 years. Like the rest of the Budget’s investments, these tax cuts are more than paid for by ensuring wealthy people and large corporations pay their fair share in taxes and by cutting spending on special interests, without raising taxes on anyone with income below $400,000 per year.
Congressional Republicans have instead offered a set of top-down tax proposals. Their agenda would add over $3 trillion to the debt with tax cuts and other giveaways skewed to the wealthy and large corporations. Remarkably, even as they have put forward trillions in tax cuts, they have also advanced proposals that would raise taxes on millions of middle-class and working Americans. And now, MAGA Republicans are demanding massive cuts to programs middle-class and working families, seniors, and students rely on — from public safety to health care to education — while reportedly declining to put forward a budget, which would show how much of these cuts are going to pay for their tax cuts, rather than reduce the debt.
But, predictably, that message failed to hit. In fact, instead of convincing Americans that Biden really wanted to help them, all it did was convince people that Biden wants to steal more money from them and led to serious outrage on the internet.
The outrage was so severe that it even lead to high-profile defections from Biden’s camp, with Senator Manchin going so far as to call for Biden to be removed from office over the new tax proposal. Speaking on the matter to Fox News Channel’s Tucker Carlson, Manchin said:
“Look, this is just delusional. Completely insane. We’re headed into a recession, the stock market is down, businesses are struggling, inflation is high, and consumers are running out of extra debt to rely upon. Their credit cards are maxed out, their homes are worth less, their paychecks don’t buy as much as they used to…it’s a bad situation. And what does the buffoon-in-chief want to do? Raise taxes! It’s absolutely insane and likely to lead to disaster for the American people. But what does he care, he’s getting checks from China! Look, Tucker, this guy just has to go. Not only is he corrupt, but he’s leading us on the path to disaster.”