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    Home»Satire»“The Last Guy Had Cheap Gas, But We Fight Climate Change”: Biden Infuriates Americans with Labor Day Speech

    “The Last Guy Had Cheap Gas, But We Fight Climate Change”: Biden Infuriates Americans with Labor Day Speech

    willSeptember 5, 2023 Satire
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    Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

    Note: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.

    Biden tried giving a speech to union workers at a steel shop in Pennsylvania for labor day and, predictably for the guy who has spent his whole life in government, it was a disaster. That’s because Joe, though he tried framing himself as a middle American tribune of the people, ended up letting his elitism slip with a climate change remark.

    That came when he was trying to contrast himself favorably with Trump by lying about the jobs situation and general economic situation in America, telling the gathered factory workers:

    And, you know, it wasn’t that long ago we were losing jobs in this country.  In fact, the guy who held this job before me was just one of two presidents in history — he was one of — but there is an important point — one of two presidents in history that left office with fewer jobs in America than when he got elected office.  By the way, do you know who the other one was?  Herbert Hoover.   Isn’t that kind of coincidental?

    Look, but we’re turning things around because of you. When the last guy was here, you were shipping jobs to China.  Now we’re bringing jobs home from China. When the last guy was here — when the last guy was here, your pensions were at risk.  We helped save millions of pensions with your help. When the last guy was here, he looked at the world from Park Avenue.  Well, I look at it from Scranton, Pennsylvania.  I look at it from Claymont, Delaware. Not a joke.  

    Then he let slip the elitist thought, saying, “And look, under the last guy, when the last guy was here, gasoline and diesel were cheap! $1, $2 a gallon! That meant people were driving, flying, whatever all over the place! Carbon was being emitted and climate change was going up! Now, under my administration, we have stopped climate change by making gas $5 a gallon! Way fewer people causing climate change with cars now!”

    That started the booing and hissing, with the crowd going from being glad Biden had replaced Trump to remembering that, under Trump, things were quite good.

    Biden then went back to trying to frame himself as a middle-class hero, saying, “Folks, all my time in public life, I’ve been referred to as “Middle-class Joe.”  I guess they thought that was a — the — somehow not very complimentary.  Well, guess what?  That’s who I am.  It doesn’t mean you’re not sophisticated because you’re middle class.  It means you work like hell.  And you know what?  Your family has to work like hell to be able to make it. Well, I’m awful sophisti- — I’m awful sophisticated about one thing.  I know who built this country.  I’ve been saying this since I ran the first time.  Let me say it loud and clear: Wall Street didn’t build America.  The middle class built America, and unions built the middle class. That’s a fact.  That’s not hyperbole.  That’s a fact.  Unions built the middle class.”


    But, as could be expected, that was a disaster because by then the crowd had grasped what Biden was up to and was furious that he was trying to fight climate change by making their gas more expensive, one of the leading causes of budget-wrecking inflation. So Biden had to walk off the stage as a cacophony of booing and shouting drowned out his speech and an agitated crowd started pressing forward.

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