NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
An old joke is that before socialists were using candles, they were using electricity. In other words, the insanity of their policies leads to a collapse of the modern systems on which we have grown reliant.
Biden apparently didn’t get that that was a joke, as he just announced in a statement on climate policy that he would be encouraging people to use candles so that less electricity would be used, thus lowering emissions. His administration said:
Since Day One, the Biden-Harris Administration has advanced the most ambitious climate agenda in history, leading a whole-of-government approach to reduce emissions across every sector of the economy, including the buildings sector, and expand affordable clean energy to every American. Last week, the Biden-Harris Administration set a bold target to reduce the cost to decarbonize new and existing housing by 50% within a decade, while delivering energy bill savings for Americans and curbing greenhouse gas emissions that come from operating, constructing, and renovating buildings.
In the United States, more than a third of greenhouse gas emissions comes from the buildings sector – with 20 percent from heating, cooling, and operating our homes. By investing in solutions to cut pollution from homes, the U.S. will help curb 37% of greenhouse gas emissions that come from operating, constructing and renovating our buildings, while protecting people’s health and lowering energy and housing costs for hardworking families, a key pillar of Bidenomics.
That’s why today, the Administration announced awards of more than $100 million from the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) through the Inflation Reduction Act – the largest investment in clean energy and climate action ever – to help renovate the homes of more than 1,500 low-income families to be zero energy and climate resilient. These energy-saving renovations will demonstrate the potential to preserve quality, affordable housing in our communities by cutting energy waste down to zero, increasing resiliency to extreme weather events worsened by climate change, and lowering costs for families. All the investments will be made in affordable housing communities serving low-income families in alignment with President Biden’s Justice40 Initiative and the Biden-Harris Administration’s commitment to environmental justice. These investments will also preserve the long-term viability and affordability of our nation’s existing stock of affordable housing and advance fair housing by increasing housing options for communities.
And how do they plan on making America a place that is willing to “decarbonize” everything? That was unclear, though the threat of force was involved. That came later when Biden vowed to use F-16s to punish “climate offenders,” ignoring the immense emissions that come from the average fighter jet.
In any case, the administration also made some “helpful recommendations” for how people could “decarbonize” their lives. One of the recommendations was “use candles” instead of electric lighting, and another was “eat the bugs” instead of “beef, poultry, or pork,” as “bugs have fewer emissions.
