NOTE: the following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
When the Biden Administration fled Afghanistan, it left in its wake not just abandoned allies for the Taliban to murder, but also billions of dollars worth of weapons. Thousands upon thousands of small arms, millions of rounds for them, rocket launchers and grenades, all of it was left for the Taliban to make use of as they saw fit.
And now much of that has ended up in Palestine and Lebanon, where it is being used against Israelis by Hamas and other Palestinian terrorist organizations bent on Israel’s destruction. Predictably, the Biden Administration tried to dodge when blamed for that.
Such happened when White House Spokesman John Kirby, called in when the job requires more competence than KJP can handle, spoke about the situation abroad. He said:
Good evening, everybody. As you know, the White House has been closely following the situation in Israel, and the President has been actively engaged, regularly receiving updates on the latest developments from the national security team. In fact, this morning, he met with members of the senior team — including the Secretary of State; National Security Advisor; the Principal Deputy National Security Advisor; the Homeland Security Advisor, Liz Sherwood-Randall; and, of course, the White House Chief of Staff, Jeff Zients — all to receive the latest update from — from the morning.
He has also spoken twice with Prime Minister Netanyahu this — over the weekend, certainly to express our deep sympathy for all those missing, wounded, and killed and to pledge his full support for Israel at this incriti- — critical and dangerous moment. He has also spoken with many of our allies and partners — including the leaders of France, Germany, Italy, and the United Kingdom — just this afternoon to help coordinate our efforts.
In response to Hamas’s horrific terrorist attacks, President Biden directed his team to do everything we can to ensure that the government of Israel has what it needs. At his direction, our military began shipping military aid to Israel and the Secretary of Defense has adjusted our force posture in the region to bolster regional deterrence efforts.
That’s when a reporter yelled out, “What does the Biden Administration have to say about the weapons it left behind in Afghanistan now being used by terrorists to kill Israeli civilians? Does it feel culpable, given that it armed the Palestinians by recklessly leaving behind so much equipment?”
Kirby fired back, “Look, we did our best. We have the most diverse officer corps ever and we tried really hard to do a good job, so we should get credit for that. And, also, I mean, look, this is different. We are, we are sending like an aircraft carrier over there. It can sail away. Far away. We don’t have to leave it behind. So we’ll try not to leave an aircraft carrier for the Taliban this time.”
That resulted in fury, with journalists and reporters going berserk over Kirby trying to make light of the situation.