NOTE: The following article is satire, not a statement of fact. Treat it as such.
Team Biden recently tried to justify its decision to send tens of billions of dollars more to the Ukrainians than to Hawaii in a press briefing, arguing that the Ukrainian war effort is more important than the fate and well-being of Americans because the Ukrainians once paid Hunter Biden a lot of money.
Beginning, KJP argued that the Brandon Administration is doing plenty to help out the Hawaiians who have seen their homes and communities torched by the blaze, saying:
The Biden-Harris Administration has mobilized a robust whole-of-government response effort to support immediate and long-term rescue and recovery efforts in Maui, Hawaii. Since the onset of the horrific fires in Maui, dozens of Federal departments and agencies, including the Department of Homeland Security through FEMA and the Coast Guard, the Department of Defense through the Navy and Army, the Department of Health and Human Services, the U.S. Forest Service, and the Small Business Administration (SBA) have been working with state and local partners on the ground to assess ongoing needs and providing resources and personnel to support response efforts.
Last Thursday, within hours of the devastating fires, President Biden signed a Major Disaster Declaration for Hawaii, and as President Biden told Governor Josh Green, the Federal Government stands ready to provide additional assistance to ensure the state recovers. This weekend, FEMA Administrator Deanne Criswell, U.S. Fire Administrator Dr. Lori Moore-Merrell and U.S. Small Business Administration Administrator Isabella Casillas Guzman surveyed catastrophic damage on the island and hosted a local press conference to reiterate the Administration’s commitment to supporting impacted communities, however long it may take.
It then added that the real issue for the US to remain focused on is the situation in the Ukraine, saying, “What really matters here, however, and this is no big change to our policy or budgetary decisions, is the situation in Ukraine. Remember, these people are real allies to America and democracy. When the president’s son was in financial trouble and difficult circumstances, Burisma hired him. That hasn’t been forgotten by us. We remember our friends, of which Ukraine is certainly one.”
Continuing, the administration then explained the difference in aid provided, saying, “And so, for that reason, we understand that the Ukrainian war is more important. To all of those who ask why we’re supporting the Ukrainians more than the Hawaiians, the answer is ‘well, Ukraine is just more important.’ And that’s why we’re sending them more money. We have to help our friends and friends of the president, and the Ukrainian government and military are certainly friends like that.”
They then declared that Zelensky would be providing personal support for Hawaii, however, through Hunter Biden’s firm Rosemont Seneca.