Team Biden Takes Action to Protect “Pedophile Rights” Following GOP Attacks on Pedo Perversions

OOPS: Biden Gets Confused During Speech, Starts Chanting “Let’s Go Brandon”

FBI Declares Confederate Statues to be More Dangerous than Antifa, BLM

English WWI Commemoration Canceled Because “Most Veterans Were White”

REPORT: Feds Started Investigation Anonymous Crack Addict, Tax Cheat But Backed Off After Realizing It Was Hunter

Oopsies: Brandon Falls Off the Stage While Talking about His Mental Competence

Unemployment Groups Label Labor Day “Racist,” Sue to Have It Removed as a Federal Holiday

Insanity: College Sues To Let “Trans-Human” Dolphin Swim in Upcoming Competition

Amazon Releases “Tolkien was Racist” Documentary Before Release of New Lord of the Rings Show

Progressive University Announces New Diversity Course Called “Kill Whitey”

YIKES: DeSantis Kicked Off Twitter for Pledging to “Feed Biden to the Gators”

“Burn, Loot, Murder”: Vladimir Putin Sounds Off on BLM When Explaining Ukraine Invasion

That Explains It: Oil Discovered Under Mar-a-Lago, Explaining Cheney Family’s Attacks on Him

OOPS: Liz Cheney Announces that She Forgot For a Few Years that She’s Supposed to Be a Republican, Wants Her Seat Back

Barron Trump Trolling? Liz Cheney Entered as Synonym for “Democrat” in Thesaurus.com By Hacker

Border Patrol Announces Confusion Over Whether It’s Supposed to Patrol Border to Keep Illegals Out or Help Them Over the Wall

Confused Hunter Biden Wonders If He Should Have Gotten Addicted to Opioids So No One would Care or Pay Attention to Him

Dr. Fauci Criticizes Hunter for Not Wearing Mask While Spending Time with Prostitutes During Covid Era, Scares Brian Stelter with Monkeypox Warning

Hunter Receives Noble Peace Prize for Distracting Uniparty from Pushing War with Russia with Leak of Embarassing Videos

“Dr.” Jill Apologizes for “Tacos” Comment, Says She Now Realizes She Should Have Used “Enchiladas” Instead