Clarence Thomas Finds Biden “Too Dumb to Be President”, Orders Him Removed from Office

Biden’s Direction Card Changed to “Mumble Angrily” after Dobbs Decision

BREAKING: Planned Parenthood Forced to “Abort” Itself in Wake of Dobbs Decision

Hillary Backs Out of 2024 in Deal with Biden to Keep Nude Pics on Hunter’s Laptop from Being Exposed

Biden Bans Juul So People Will Pick Up their Free Crack Pipes

OOPS: Biden Makes Racist Remark that Menthol Cigs Ban is “Revenge on Cornpop”

“Trans T-Rex” Kid Excited to Convince Mom to Only Feed Him Dino Chicken Nuggets

BREAKING: SCOTUS Rules It Is Unconstitutional To Call Someone’s Phone When a Text Would Be Perfectly Adequate

Raging Leftists Kill Cops Instead of Babies in Post-Dobbs Riots

Disney to Add Abortion Scene In Next Star Wars Movie in Defiance of Dobbs

World Economic Forum Goes Broke after Spending Billions on Bug-Based Catering Service

“In the Control of a Senile Lunatic”: Putin Cites America’s Newly Passed Red Flag Law When Demanding US Military Disarm

Beat the Market: “Inverse Team Biden Pronouncements” ETF Blows SP 500 Out of the Water in 2022

Bill Gates Buys Dasani, Replaces Its Water with His Famous “Reclaimed Poop Water”

Twitter Addicts Shocked to Discover that They Can Use More than 280 Characters In Real Life after Twitter Goes Dark Thanks to Solar Power

Archaeological Report: Jesus Cloak Made of MyPillow Giza dream Sheet Material

Bigfoot Spotted in “FJB” Shirt, Caught Stealing and Trashing Biden Lawn Signs

College Enrolls Dolphin that Identifies as Human, Thrashes Competition

Mike Lindell Sells Johnny Depp Giza Dream Sheets in Wake of Amber Heard Revelations

CIA Releases Report Suggesting that Biden’s Bike Was Made in Russia, “KGB Asset”